It's not so much that I want to be right about this, it's just that I know my family. Things have of course descended into chaos as we inch our way towards Christianmas.
My brother and I are very different. Different to the point that we just don't get along. In fact, most people are surprised to hear that I have a brother. We all know that I can be offensive, but it's usually in a fun comical way that doesn't really do any harm. My brother is offensive in a way that is totally opposite: He has no tact. I made a white trash joke based on the type of beer that I drink, he then proceeded to take it to the next level. I can't recall exactly what he said, but something about trailer trash. He is the one person that always says the thing that sends you off the edge.
If you're one of those that has been following my blog from the beginning then you know that I love to dwell. I will obsess over small things to the point of driving myself and everyone else nuts. This is not just some adorable trait that I've come by on my own, this happens to be something that I've adopted. My mother is exactly the same. After my brother made the comment she was ready to knock him out.
Things escalated with spilled drinks and broken glasses. The fighting continued to the point that I ended up making half of dinner to get away. Things calmed down after my brother finally went away. While talking to my mother afterwards she commented on not meaning to ruin my visit. I only come out here once a year for a few days, it should be all fun and games. I told her she was ruining my visit and to let it go.
It's now Christianmas eve and I seem to have caught the attitude. Aside from the nosebleed that I enjoyed this morning, I may be catching a cold. Everyone here smokes, so I can't tell if my sinuses are freaking out from that or if I'm getting sick.
The big day is tomorrow and never have we had a holiday without a problem. Let's see if this year's different.
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Monday, December 21, 2009
Hell for The Holidays
This is irrelevant, but I have to share it. About two years ago my mom and I were riding in the car. I had a can of soda that was half full, including some spit. You know, I didn't want to spit into the wind so I did it in the can. My mom picked it up and took a big drink before I could stop her. She spit soda all over the car as I laughed hysterically. She just brought it up again, making me laugh so hard I almost wet myself. Best story ever.
To my story: Today I boarded a flight before the sun was up, in an effort to be home for the holidays. The lines were quick and the passengers mellow. Everything was great until I realized that I was trapped in the middle of a germ-fest! Everyone around me was coughing and sneezing. It was like being trapped in my own personal hell!
Landing in the fog laden Salt Lake City, I met my mother and my wife for lunch. We had a few beers before deciding to purchase the trademark shirts of Salt Lake. SL,UT. What can be better than a shirt that says slut? My mom and I then left to go fetch my brother. An interesting situation was obviously in the making. My brother and I are not the best of friends.
The strangest thing was where we picked him up, at my grandmother's house. I haven't seen my mom's mom in about 14 years. It was slightly awkward considering all of the family drama that exists on that side. We piled back in the car and my mom decided it would be best for me to drive so she could have a beer. Jealous? Yes I was.
The drive was terrifying for me. I haven't driven more than a mile at a time in the last two years. Getting in the driver's seat for a three hour drive on a windy mountain road was definitely rough. I had white knuckles and knots in my back by the time we made it to the house. OY VEY!
It's starting out tame, but I know the drama s coming. It's Christmas after all.
To my story: Today I boarded a flight before the sun was up, in an effort to be home for the holidays. The lines were quick and the passengers mellow. Everything was great until I realized that I was trapped in the middle of a germ-fest! Everyone around me was coughing and sneezing. It was like being trapped in my own personal hell!
Landing in the fog laden Salt Lake City, I met my mother and my wife for lunch. We had a few beers before deciding to purchase the trademark shirts of Salt Lake. SL,UT. What can be better than a shirt that says slut? My mom and I then left to go fetch my brother. An interesting situation was obviously in the making. My brother and I are not the best of friends.
The strangest thing was where we picked him up, at my grandmother's house. I haven't seen my mom's mom in about 14 years. It was slightly awkward considering all of the family drama that exists on that side. We piled back in the car and my mom decided it would be best for me to drive so she could have a beer. Jealous? Yes I was.
The drive was terrifying for me. I haven't driven more than a mile at a time in the last two years. Getting in the driver's seat for a three hour drive on a windy mountain road was definitely rough. I had white knuckles and knots in my back by the time we made it to the house. OY VEY!
It's starting out tame, but I know the drama s coming. It's Christmas after all.
Sunday, December 13, 2009
Dick Dumb
We all know, or have been, the dick dumb person. You know, the one that stays with the guy because he's going to change. That's dick dumb.
Maybe you're the girl that loves the guy that cheats on her because 'he doesn't mean to'. That's dick dumb.
You could also just be giving someone tons of gifts in the hope that they'll give you love. That's super dick dumb.
You could also just be a dick or dumb. Those are totally different things. I usually get a bad case of dick and dumb when it comes to dating. I was out last night with a friend I rarely get to see and we were talking about my Shew situation.
I play the defensive like any sane person that dares to date. I expect guys to screw me and then screw me over. That's what they do, isn't it? Shew is a nice guy. I dated one of those a few years ago. I think he still hates my face. I've gone so far as to ask if there's some secret that he's going to come out with, like having a secret boyfriend. It's so hard to trust that a person can actually be genuinely nice without some kind of motive.
The friend I was out with last night was listening to me talk about Shew. Her advice: Knock the shit off. Pretty obvious and sound advice. It's not that I'm out doing anything, it's just that I tend to create drama where there is none. Lucky for me there is an incredible amount of tension at home. That takes the pressure off of Shew to provide me with drama.
The only real issue we've come upon is me not being able to expression any emotion. Well, I can expression the negative emotions like a crack whore looking for a fix, but when it comes to saying the nice things... it's like trying to pull my own teeth! I'm told it's because of bad family relations. That can't be true. It could just be the fact that I'm a bitter factory and it's way more fun to pollute the optimist pool.
While I am certainly not dick dumb with Shew, at this point, I am trying to get a handle on my dumb. So far so good, but there's always tomorrow.
Maybe you're the girl that loves the guy that cheats on her because 'he doesn't mean to'. That's dick dumb.
You could also just be giving someone tons of gifts in the hope that they'll give you love. That's super dick dumb.
You could also just be a dick or dumb. Those are totally different things. I usually get a bad case of dick and dumb when it comes to dating. I was out last night with a friend I rarely get to see and we were talking about my Shew situation.
I play the defensive like any sane person that dares to date. I expect guys to screw me and then screw me over. That's what they do, isn't it? Shew is a nice guy. I dated one of those a few years ago. I think he still hates my face. I've gone so far as to ask if there's some secret that he's going to come out with, like having a secret boyfriend. It's so hard to trust that a person can actually be genuinely nice without some kind of motive.
The friend I was out with last night was listening to me talk about Shew. Her advice: Knock the shit off. Pretty obvious and sound advice. It's not that I'm out doing anything, it's just that I tend to create drama where there is none. Lucky for me there is an incredible amount of tension at home. That takes the pressure off of Shew to provide me with drama.
The only real issue we've come upon is me not being able to expression any emotion. Well, I can expression the negative emotions like a crack whore looking for a fix, but when it comes to saying the nice things... it's like trying to pull my own teeth! I'm told it's because of bad family relations. That can't be true. It could just be the fact that I'm a bitter factory and it's way more fun to pollute the optimist pool.
While I am certainly not dick dumb with Shew, at this point, I am trying to get a handle on my dumb. So far so good, but there's always tomorrow.
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Cycles
Everything has an expiration date. That old milk in the fridge, that best friend from high school, and that person you thought you'd spend forever with. Nothing lasts forever; society says so.
Things in my personal life have been a little bumpy. My roommate and I had the big blow up a week ago, and things have simmered down. I almost feel bad for not wanting to work things out, but i just don't care. It's one of those situations where we are able to live together and go about our lives without animosity, but there's no interaction. Everyone is warning me that she's going to try and do something, but I don't think so. I mean, we just aren't friends anymore. We're not enemies. That's a very different situation. Had we turned into enemies I would worry about her trying to screw with me, or feel compelled to hurt her, but fortunately that's not the case. The countdown is on to the moment we are free of our prison apartment!
As of late, I've been spending a lot of time with Shew. Things are going well with just a few minor skirmishes. I've only been pissed off once so far. That's a Jewmas miracle! Our only problem is that when he gets drunk he likes to say what I feel to be snide comments. Things like: You don't acknowledge the nice things I do. That's the one that pissed me off. Out of all the guys I've dated, I actually am putting a lot of effort into Shew. So much so, I even dropped the attitude immediately and decided to just let it go for a change. It put a downer on the rest of the night, only made worse by my boss making me climb out of bed to work on an email campaign.
Oh, Shew and the Animator have been hanging out. That's partially of my doing. I introduced them and then they became Facebook friends. Side Note: My cell attaches to my friend's Facebook accounts. My roommate deleted me after our fight; I found this out when she vanished from my phone. Tacky! I then was forced to delete her boyfriend as a friend. She's told me before how she uses his account to see what he and his friends are saying about her. I didn't want her having the ability to get back to what's posted on my profile. Anyway, while I was in Baltimore, Shew wanted to go out and I told him to text the Animator. They went out, etc. Fast forward to last night when I went out to have a beer with the Animator. I was slow to reply to Shew when he asked where we were. He then texted the Animator to find out. That was not ok. I'm fine with them being friends, but the Animator is still my friend first. Meaning, I don't want the boy checking up on me by going over my head. Wait until I reply before tailing me. That's simple enough. It wasn't that I didn't want him to come hangout with us, but everyone needs to have separation between their worlds.
Other than the bad case of GMS that I'm experiencing, things are great.
Things in my personal life have been a little bumpy. My roommate and I had the big blow up a week ago, and things have simmered down. I almost feel bad for not wanting to work things out, but i just don't care. It's one of those situations where we are able to live together and go about our lives without animosity, but there's no interaction. Everyone is warning me that she's going to try and do something, but I don't think so. I mean, we just aren't friends anymore. We're not enemies. That's a very different situation. Had we turned into enemies I would worry about her trying to screw with me, or feel compelled to hurt her, but fortunately that's not the case. The countdown is on to the moment we are free of our prison apartment!
As of late, I've been spending a lot of time with Shew. Things are going well with just a few minor skirmishes. I've only been pissed off once so far. That's a Jewmas miracle! Our only problem is that when he gets drunk he likes to say what I feel to be snide comments. Things like: You don't acknowledge the nice things I do. That's the one that pissed me off. Out of all the guys I've dated, I actually am putting a lot of effort into Shew. So much so, I even dropped the attitude immediately and decided to just let it go for a change. It put a downer on the rest of the night, only made worse by my boss making me climb out of bed to work on an email campaign.
Oh, Shew and the Animator have been hanging out. That's partially of my doing. I introduced them and then they became Facebook friends. Side Note: My cell attaches to my friend's Facebook accounts. My roommate deleted me after our fight; I found this out when she vanished from my phone. Tacky! I then was forced to delete her boyfriend as a friend. She's told me before how she uses his account to see what he and his friends are saying about her. I didn't want her having the ability to get back to what's posted on my profile. Anyway, while I was in Baltimore, Shew wanted to go out and I told him to text the Animator. They went out, etc. Fast forward to last night when I went out to have a beer with the Animator. I was slow to reply to Shew when he asked where we were. He then texted the Animator to find out. That was not ok. I'm fine with them being friends, but the Animator is still my friend first. Meaning, I don't want the boy checking up on me by going over my head. Wait until I reply before tailing me. That's simple enough. It wasn't that I didn't want him to come hangout with us, but everyone needs to have separation between their worlds.
Other than the bad case of GMS that I'm experiencing, things are great.
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