Things have been nonstop lately. Add in allergies so bad that I want to off myself and it's a sexy recipe for fun.
Last weekend was gay pride in New York and everyone knows that I'm not interested in participating. That didn't stop myself, The Animator and Shew from going out three nights in a row. Shew wasn't able to hang in there with us, succumbing to the alcohol demons. Though we went to several bars there's not much to report back on. The most interesting thing is that Shew and I ended up having sex. Somehow I managed to get trashed Thursday night and started talking about feelings. You know how when you get to that happy point and you love everyone? The sex was good... I measure this by how sore I was the next day.
The downside to sex with an ex is that you have to talk about it after. Shew wanted to talk about what we were and if we were going somewhere. I was straight about not wanting to date because I enjoy being single too much. He seemed to take the news oddly well. Now I have to wonder if he's going to vanish like so many others. People don't like hearing what sometimes needs to be said.
On an up note, I did finally get to hangout with London. Yes, he's been here for weeks and we managed to get together on his last night. He invited me to dinner at a friend's house, but not a friend I had previously met and hated on. It was definitely in London's favor that I didn't get together with him a weekend ago. Feeling like I owed him a little, I made the trip with him to Harlem for dinner. These new friends were actually a fun duo. Nothing like some of the others that I can't stand and have to will myself not to push over a balcony.
Things began to wind down and London and I mellowed on this super lumpy sofa. I can only compare it to sleeping on a four-hundred pound woman. I got up to use the bathroom and returned to find London passed out. Being nice, I laid down on the floor. A few hours later London woke me up to get back on the sofa with him. This is where things got weird. We cuddled for the rest of the night...and that's it. We just cuddled like two lesbians. The kicker is that it wasn't too shabby. It's kind of like the perfect first date that never has the bad second date.
The only question I have is: Are we turning into regular friends versus sexy friends? In the beginning it was all about hooking up. Now it seems like we hangout and talk when he's in town. Either way it's fine, but what caused the shift in penis perception?
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Sunday, June 20, 2010
Tastes Like German
A Friday night is not to be wasted... it's for getting wasted. That's what the motto has been for the past few months and there's no reason to change it now.
Being the smart drunk that I am pre-gaming began around 7pm. The itinerary had London at 10:30 and sex likely at some point after. This was changed when a text message rearranged my plans. The Animator had a date blow him off (not in the sexy way) and was free for fun and sexy panda play time. I met him at Phoenix where were we had a few drinks and a round of pool. Staying busy was important because not far off was what looked to be a Mexican gay jabbing his tongue into his cheek and staring our way. Either that boy had a canker sore or he was lookin' for dick!
Time has a magical way of escaping when fun is on the rise. It was time for me to go meet London but I had to make a stop a little farther Uptown first. Dragging The Animator all the way to Christmas Central we were in, out and back to the bar in the sip of a drink. We stopped at Therapy not only because it was time for another round of drinks, but I had to pee. Baby (the lady that inhabits and operates Christmas Central) has a new chocolate boyfriend who ushered us out as fast as we were let in. This meant skipping over my usual bathroom pit stop.
I sent London a text to invite him to the bar because it would take me forever to get to his friend's house. I wanted to see London but there's a risk when I go with him to a party. I'm likely to see Wall Street or his little faggy friend that always pretends not to know my name. Before I knew it we were heading to the Ritz for a quick dance and another drink. London wasn't interested in attending, but that's the downside to someone being your hump buddy and not your boyfriend, they can do whatever they want. Wait... I take that back. That's a great thing! The Animator had a friend join us and we headed over to the daddy bar where I felt it would be a good idea to take some clothes off.
When you're at the daddy bar you have to watch your ass; I was more interested in having people watch mine. I only stripped my upper half and was suddenly getting that itch to move on. We left as the sun was rising and everyone was ready for bed. Except for me, I had no interest in going to bed. Beer was still pumping through me and I wanted to play. After all, I had pent up excitement from London. So, on my cab ride home I picked up a German boy that happened to have moved to Brooklyn two days before.
Let's run down why this hook-up was a bad idea. German means he may not be circumcised. Sadly my drunken brain did not think of this at the time. When we actually got back to my apartment the German wanted to talk. When he finally did shut up it turned out he had no idea how to kiss among other things. In fact, this was the clumsiest/worst sexual encounter I've ever had. I would have had more fun with a lesbian and a paper bag. Last but not least, the boy had that gross sweaty European smell. EEK!
Being the smart drunk that I am pre-gaming began around 7pm. The itinerary had London at 10:30 and sex likely at some point after. This was changed when a text message rearranged my plans. The Animator had a date blow him off (not in the sexy way) and was free for fun and sexy panda play time. I met him at Phoenix where were we had a few drinks and a round of pool. Staying busy was important because not far off was what looked to be a Mexican gay jabbing his tongue into his cheek and staring our way. Either that boy had a canker sore or he was lookin' for dick!
Time has a magical way of escaping when fun is on the rise. It was time for me to go meet London but I had to make a stop a little farther Uptown first. Dragging The Animator all the way to Christmas Central we were in, out and back to the bar in the sip of a drink. We stopped at Therapy not only because it was time for another round of drinks, but I had to pee. Baby (the lady that inhabits and operates Christmas Central) has a new chocolate boyfriend who ushered us out as fast as we were let in. This meant skipping over my usual bathroom pit stop.
I sent London a text to invite him to the bar because it would take me forever to get to his friend's house. I wanted to see London but there's a risk when I go with him to a party. I'm likely to see Wall Street or his little faggy friend that always pretends not to know my name. Before I knew it we were heading to the Ritz for a quick dance and another drink. London wasn't interested in attending, but that's the downside to someone being your hump buddy and not your boyfriend, they can do whatever they want. Wait... I take that back. That's a great thing! The Animator had a friend join us and we headed over to the daddy bar where I felt it would be a good idea to take some clothes off.
When you're at the daddy bar you have to watch your ass; I was more interested in having people watch mine. I only stripped my upper half and was suddenly getting that itch to move on. We left as the sun was rising and everyone was ready for bed. Except for me, I had no interest in going to bed. Beer was still pumping through me and I wanted to play. After all, I had pent up excitement from London. So, on my cab ride home I picked up a German boy that happened to have moved to Brooklyn two days before.
Let's run down why this hook-up was a bad idea. German means he may not be circumcised. Sadly my drunken brain did not think of this at the time. When we actually got back to my apartment the German wanted to talk. When he finally did shut up it turned out he had no idea how to kiss among other things. In fact, this was the clumsiest/worst sexual encounter I've ever had. I would have had more fun with a lesbian and a paper bag. Last but not least, the boy had that gross sweaty European smell. EEK!
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Eat My Cake
Things have been a little on the chaotic side as of late. From rehashing break-ups to missed connections everything has been nonstop. Thank the lord for alcohol.
Shew left for China and the first night he was gone ended up being the third night I went out on the town. The problem came the next morning when Shew called me bright and early. Then my boss called. Then my mother. It was like a threesome of calls that repeated for three hours and drove me nuts. Who wants to be bothered when they're drunk and trying to sleep? Finally answering, I was in full Mr. Pissy mode.
Suddenly I was being asked these questions about who I was with and where I went. Does any of that really matter? We've done a great job of being friends, but we spend so much time together it seems like we're still dating. This meant we had to have a talk. EEK! I voiced that I'll do whatever the fuck I want. If I wanted to answer to someone then I'd move back in with my parents or get married. I think we have an understanding but now I'm wondering if it really is possible to be friends with an ex. Will we always end up running around in a circles?
The drama was offset by the fact that London arrived in town and I was hoping to see him. The Animator and I were just drinking and looking for sexy fun when he found it and I was left waiting for London. Eventually London showed up (without any of the friends I hate!) and we had a drink and danced for a bit. Around 4:30am I was to the drunk point where bed was the only option. Leaving, London, suggested we meet on Tuesday night for a romp and Wednesday for lunch. Annoyed he wasn't coming home with me, I agreed to the delayed date and went on my way. That night of drunkenness led to a broken picture and a mess on the floor. Oy!
When Tuesday finally arrived it was time for Disco Biscuit's birthday and sexy London time... I could hardly wait. The party felt long because I had to last three hours before getting to play. Once The Animator and I made our way out to the bar scene I was ready to get drink number five in me. Around midnight we were at B Bar and some foreign guy tried telling me to put my phone away and that humans were more important. My argument went as such: A phone never tells me what to do, asks for anything or gives me shit. Anyone that wants to be in a relationship is an idiot. He got up and left our table. Too bad, I was hoping for a fight! The Animator told me to text London and it was sounding like a good idea. I sent a text just to say hello. No response. It was becoming very clear that I was being stood up. There were no set in stone plans but if you tell me you're coming to see me then you damn well better show. Plus nothing makes me fly into a rage faster than someone making me wait.
Wednesday arrived and I didn't here from London until it was again time for cocktails. Unfortunately I had become fried from five hangovers in seven days and terribly behind in work. It also seemed like I should refrain from jumping at the chance to climb on the person that used weed as an excuse not to hangout. Luckily we're not dating so it holds no value and in a day it won't matter. It's disappointing that it's been another six months and will probably be several more before we have a chance to hangout again.
The moral of this story is what I already knew. Stick with my cellular relationship. I can handle friends, but ex's are trouble and lovers are disasters!
Shew left for China and the first night he was gone ended up being the third night I went out on the town. The problem came the next morning when Shew called me bright and early. Then my boss called. Then my mother. It was like a threesome of calls that repeated for three hours and drove me nuts. Who wants to be bothered when they're drunk and trying to sleep? Finally answering, I was in full Mr. Pissy mode.
Suddenly I was being asked these questions about who I was with and where I went. Does any of that really matter? We've done a great job of being friends, but we spend so much time together it seems like we're still dating. This meant we had to have a talk. EEK! I voiced that I'll do whatever the fuck I want. If I wanted to answer to someone then I'd move back in with my parents or get married. I think we have an understanding but now I'm wondering if it really is possible to be friends with an ex. Will we always end up running around in a circles?
The drama was offset by the fact that London arrived in town and I was hoping to see him. The Animator and I were just drinking and looking for sexy fun when he found it and I was left waiting for London. Eventually London showed up (without any of the friends I hate!) and we had a drink and danced for a bit. Around 4:30am I was to the drunk point where bed was the only option. Leaving, London, suggested we meet on Tuesday night for a romp and Wednesday for lunch. Annoyed he wasn't coming home with me, I agreed to the delayed date and went on my way. That night of drunkenness led to a broken picture and a mess on the floor. Oy!
When Tuesday finally arrived it was time for Disco Biscuit's birthday and sexy London time... I could hardly wait. The party felt long because I had to last three hours before getting to play. Once The Animator and I made our way out to the bar scene I was ready to get drink number five in me. Around midnight we were at B Bar and some foreign guy tried telling me to put my phone away and that humans were more important. My argument went as such: A phone never tells me what to do, asks for anything or gives me shit. Anyone that wants to be in a relationship is an idiot. He got up and left our table. Too bad, I was hoping for a fight! The Animator told me to text London and it was sounding like a good idea. I sent a text just to say hello. No response. It was becoming very clear that I was being stood up. There were no set in stone plans but if you tell me you're coming to see me then you damn well better show. Plus nothing makes me fly into a rage faster than someone making me wait.
Wednesday arrived and I didn't here from London until it was again time for cocktails. Unfortunately I had become fried from five hangovers in seven days and terribly behind in work. It also seemed like I should refrain from jumping at the chance to climb on the person that used weed as an excuse not to hangout. Luckily we're not dating so it holds no value and in a day it won't matter. It's disappointing that it's been another six months and will probably be several more before we have a chance to hangout again.
The moral of this story is what I already knew. Stick with my cellular relationship. I can handle friends, but ex's are trouble and lovers are disasters!
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